Time to Give Up on Fighting Your Fear of Driving
Posted by Rich Presta on 04/28/08 in Uncategorized
Yesterday I spoke to someone who told me they’ve been “fighting” their fear of driving for years and just couldn’t get themselves to “push through it”. Later on in the day someone else told me how they’d been “trying like hell” and just couldn’t get past a particular hurdle.
It made me think back to when I still was afraid of driving and how I’d white knuckle the steering wheel, grit my teeth through the panic, and somehow sweat and claw my way from stoplight to stoplight, wondering why I was never getting any better. I looked at my fear like an opponent, like something I had to beat. I can even remember thinking if I could just outlast it maybe it would ‘die’.
Boy, was I wrong.
You CAN’T out fight it. You can’t do it because it’s not real, it’s like a mirage. It’s like those Chinese handcuffs that go on your thumbs and the harder you try to pull yourself free from them the tighter their grip gets, but if you relax and stop fighting them they slip right off…
Your fighting is what feeds your fear. When you stop fighting, there’s no more momentum. That doesn’t mean you’ll be totally fear free right away, but it does mean that you’ll take away it’s ability to grow.
The next time you get anxious while driving, instead of tensing, let go. Instead of gripping the wheel harder, relax.
You can’t fight anxiety with MORE anxiety.
The Driving Fear program shows you some really powerful techniques you can use in the car to help you calm your body and slow your mind so you can stop feeding your anxiety. The more relaxed you can be in the face of your fear, the quicker you’ll starve it.
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laurie stanforth | Apr 29, 2008 | Reply
HI RICH SORRY I HAVE NOT E MAILED YOU ,I HAVE BEEN ON THE ROAD WITH EVERY THING IN MY MIND WHAT YOU HAVE SENT ME , I AM GETTING MORE CONFIDENT EACH TIME ,AND I AM NOT SO NERVOUS THE RED SOCK IS GREAT THAT MAKES ME LAUGH SO I AM STILL TRYING. GOODBYE FOR NOW
Earlene | Apr 29, 2008 | Reply
Hi Rich,
Road Trip Update….the trip to the Twin Cities last weekend was a milestone improvement for me. Although I did not drive, as a passenger, I was so much more calm and actually kept focused on the destination and events. Wow!! That is something I haven’t been able to say in the past. All the relaxation techniques just seemed to happen. I did do a short local highway hop on and off yesterday….success again. Your program has put a smile on my face and hope in my heart. I continue the path.
Thanks,
Earlene
Rich Presta | Apr 29, 2008 | Reply
Awesome stories!
I’m always thrilled to hear how well everyone is doing. I’m proud of both of you, knowing I put smiles on faces puts one on mine.
Amanda | Apr 30, 2008 | Reply
This is a great post. That’s so true, because the concept of “fighting” fear turns it into something it’s not. I’m discovering through the program that this requires a total change of mindset, and now I understand how to get there. I am actually driving for the sheer enjoyment of it again, which is HUGE for me. With every goal I achieve, I congratulate myself, and I start to remember what it felt like to not even think twice about driving. Really realizing that the thing you’re “fighting” is yourself makes a tremendous difference!
Toni | May 10, 2008 | Reply
Hi Rich,
You crack me up. Sorry for not getting back to you but I realize that feedback is important. Otherwise, what is the point?
I am an LVN and working on my RN, going through an accelerated program.
I wanted to let you know that I am driving on the free ways. I am taking baby steps at the moment and I am learning not to stress myself out.
Thank you for your continued emails and supports!